Tera-pies

It's a "Syaf" version, because I wrote a similar article for a friend of mine. This one's the shorter, more selamba/lepak version. It's basically a list of things I realized or noticed after working in the fnb line for awhile.

1. Most people don't bother to read

There are huge signs that say "order here", "cash only", "collect here" and "self service". But do they care? Nope. "Bro, latte tak sampai sampai lagi". You're supposed to pick it up yourself you prick. Tak nampak ke ada 5 orang lagi dekat counter tu, rajin je diorang tunggu. "Don't throw tissues into the bowl, we have bins for that". There are 2 of those frickin huge ass, block lettered signs; one when you frickin open the door, another when you're about to sit on the throne. Balik balik, sama gak, masuk toilet, tu dia, selagi ada lubang, tersumbat la dengan tissue. Pastu tanya kenapa toilet selalu out of order. Ee aku lempang karang.

2. There are 2 basic stereotypes of "corporate" people

They're either pushy pricks who lack common courtesy(like "excuse me", "hi", "thank you") and expect things to go their way errtime. Chop chop. And yes, they will more or less have some variation of the fuckface plastered on their mugs...ee rasa cam nak tumbuk je kekadang. The other type of corporate people though, I like! While they too may have that same sense of urgency, they still treat you like a human being. And its usually the latter type that will come in errday errday, become regulars, make polite conversation, and might even pop in when they're much more free in the weekends.

3. Working environment dictates my mood

So far with colleagues, regardless of where I work, takde hal la. Everyone I've met so far seemed chill and lepakable and seemingly have no interest in office politics. Kalau ada pon, I'm not a part of it, which is just the way I like it. But one stark difference between workplace A and B? The background music. There's "typical" coffee joint music(think uninspiring jazz, terlalu mellow stuff etc), vs a vinyl corner and custom ipod playlists by a manager/supervisor with good taste in music(amboi, mengampu nampak...haha, but true though).

4. England very the important

This applies more for the Aussie portion of my fnb career. Kat Malaysia tak kisah sangat. I understand how white people feel now; the whole "you come to our country, learn to speak the language" thing. Haha. Yang paling takleh blah, they'll have the accent down. Tapi pronunciation bapak berterabur. Grammar teruk takpe. I'm not much of a grammar nazi. Heck, my grammar kekadang all over the place gak, since im too used to speaking rojak. But its hard when you can't pronounce chocolate or regular. To be fair though, the locals aren't completely untouched either. Their main problem is that they mumble(again for both examples, not all obviously). Speak up man! How am I gonna take your order if you dont speak up?